- Deirdre Brandner
Why nagging doesn’t work

1) No one likes to feel controlled
Being nagged feels like you’re being manipulated
2) Pressuring someone can lead to defiance
When you keep saying the same things over and over again it sends a message that you don’t believe they can complete the task.
3) Children tune out to nagging
It trains children to tune us out because they assume we are going to either continuously say the same thing or say something negative.
4) Nagging leads to resistance
It is human instinct to dig your heels in when you feel someone is constantly pressuring you
5) Nagging causes resentment
Resentment can easily tear down relationships. So keep this in mind the next time you feel the urge to nag your child.
6) We often go from pleading to threatening without getting any change
Instead state the rules clearly and give consequences. This actually gives your child some control, because in effect, you’re saying, “It’s up to you”
What does work:
Involve children in solving the problem
Look for alternative ways to get things done
Try and understand the issue from their perspective
Pay attention to what is triggering you to nag